Patience is a Virtue…Right?

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As I’m sure I’ve mentioned before patience is not one of my strongest characteristics.  I mean, I have patience for children, elderly, that type of thing but I do not have patience for waiting and I do not have the best patience for sitting around feeling useless and doing nothing.  I know am I not totally useless because I am growing a tiny human inside of me and it is all worth it, but still…

I think what is really getting to me is the worrying.  I worry all the time about things not going right with this pregnancy, heck, it is still hard for me to believe that after all of this time I am actually pregnant.  I worry that it will be chemical, or I will lose it, or something will just go wrong because it doesn’t seem possible that for once something is going right.  My beta yesterday was 426 which is good-it’s going in the right direction.  My thyroid was a little high so the doctor has me doubling my dose of synthroid, hopefully that helps.  Other than that the OHSS is progressing slowly but surely.  I am still on bed rest and the doctor said it will be up to me and how feel whether or not we go on our vacation up north next week over the holiday.  I really hope we can because I was looking forward to it but if not it’s ok, we have a baby to think of now!  I go back Friday for more blood work and then our first ultrasound is scheduled for July 6 (which is coincidentally my husband’s birthday)!  Until then I will continue to worry and continue to check the toilet paper every time I go to the bathroom, and monitor every ache, pain, and twinge.

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About thepcosandinfertilityjourney

For almost two years I have felt so down and alone trying to maintain a normal and happy life since I realized that my husband and I would struggle to create a family. I began to second guess everything in my life, have I done the right things, made the right choices, is it my job, is it where I live, what is it and what can I do to make it better? Then, one night while laying in bed it hit me, and the words just started flowing. I have always loved writing and when I was little always wanted to be an author but never had the inspiration of something to write about; now I do. I am going to share my story, my struggles, my hopes, my fears, my triumphs in the hope that it will help someone else going through the same rollercoaster that I am the way many books, blogs, and chats have helped me cope. I will share with you how I am determined to make sure that one of my life’s dreams are not shot down and the obstacles I go through to get there.

2 responses »

  1. Hey lady, just letting you know my first round was a success too! In fact our numbers and everything are very similar. I too am having a tough time with worrying. I am so scared I will lose this baby but I am forcing myself to stop thinking that way. I go for an ultrasound next Thursday and am praying to see our little bean and maybe even a heartbeat. Best wishes, hoping for the same for you.

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