I hate to complain…

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I wonder if many women who are pregnant after IF feel this way.  I have wanted this so bad for so many years and have gone through so much to get here  and now I feel so guilty every time I complain about anything even though I honestly feel miserable.  I have so many hormones running through me, not just because of the two little miracles growing inside of me but also because my ovaries are about 5 times their normal sizes so I am getting all kinds of hormones pumped through me.  Tomorrow will officially be 7 weeks and no pants or bottoms fit me, that I don’t mind too much.  What I do mind is the constant nausea.  THANKFULLY this has not been accompanied with vomiting and I am keeping my fingers crossed.  I am exhausted all the time it is hard for me to drag myself to work (now that I am finally back after 3 weeks) and to sit at my computer or do whatever else needs to be done.  I am also in so much pain.  My ovaries are always disagreeing with whatever I do, if it weren’t for my newly acquired body pillow I would not get any sleep (not like I get much because I have to pee all the time, or get comfortable again, or get awoken with a crazy dream).  Also, if I eat to much, or (excuse me) have to pass gas it feels like my stomach is going to rupture.  Thank GOD for the chicken noodle soup and grilled cheese that my husband makes me all the time because I think those are the only two things that don’t upset my stomach and sound good.  We have been waiting for this new branch of one of our favorite Syrian restaurants to open less than a mile from our house for months now and yesterday it finally did and I was so excited!  As soon as my husband got home from work we went there for dinner and it tasted soooo good.  It’s one of my favorite foods but I paid for it all last night and even more so today and am running to the bathroom constantly for some unpleasant business.  Guess I need to stick with the bland…..

Well, now that I have given you all such a pretty picture of everything going on with my body you can now see why I feel like I am complaining, LOL.  I just try to keep it all to myself and concentrate on the end result (just like when I was shoving needle after needle into my stomach).  Honestly though, more than anything I want to feel better and have some energy so I can start preparing for these two precious bundles of joy and enjoy what I have waited for for so long.

Good luck to everyone, I hope your TTC and first trimesters are going wonderfully!

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About thepcosandinfertilityjourney

For almost two years I have felt so down and alone trying to maintain a normal and happy life since I realized that my husband and I would struggle to create a family. I began to second guess everything in my life, have I done the right things, made the right choices, is it my job, is it where I live, what is it and what can I do to make it better? Then, one night while laying in bed it hit me, and the words just started flowing. I have always loved writing and when I was little always wanted to be an author but never had the inspiration of something to write about; now I do. I am going to share my story, my struggles, my hopes, my fears, my triumphs in the hope that it will help someone else going through the same rollercoaster that I am the way many books, blogs, and chats have helped me cope. I will share with you how I am determined to make sure that one of my life’s dreams are not shot down and the obstacles I go through to get there.

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